Driving in Oshkosh...Or Anywhere

(Pulls out box labeled "Soap" and climbs on) Have you been driving lately? I'm willing to bet you have. Maybe you were the guy who drove with his blinker on for the five blocks I followed him. Or perhaps you were the teenager in the car with three of your friends. Or maybe you were the soccer mom in the mini-van. If you weren't one of my fictional characters, you must have been like me, an average driver trying to get across town for work, groceries or miscellaeous errands. Along the way a variety of annoying things occurred. Let's review. The School Zone It always happens to me. I get behind the person who doesn't read the fine print on the school zone sign. The ubiquitous "15 MPH" sign has some additional words -- When children are present. In other words, when no kids are to be seen, the normal speed limit applies. When is that guy ahead of me realize that no child is going to be walking to school at 6:45 am and he can go 30 mph instead of 15? The Traffic Light I didn't take driver's ed in Wisconsin therefore I am exempt from calling them "stop and go" lights. But I did take driver's ed. Some basics to be reviewed. Green turn arrows -- use them. Yellow means slow down and stop if possible. Red means wait your turn. And green still means go. Next time you are waiting at the light, just see how many people violate this simple color-coded system. I'm really getting sick of missing my green turn arrow because the cross traffic can't understand what a red light means. My vote goes to the guy who pushes for funding to get cameras on the traffic lights and has the police department issuing tickets as a result of their findings. Left Turn Lanes Who ever did the traffic pattern studies in Oshkosh must have really like left turn only lanes. As I sit and wait for the third time at the corner of 6th and Ohio, I wonder what it would be like if all of the left turn lanes disappeared. Turn Signals Just because the driver ahead of me knows where he is going doesn't mean I do. That stick on the steering wheel? The one that has some dust on it? It is your turn indicator. Others around you appreciate your utilization of said device. (steps down from soap box and slides it back into the dark corner) The worst part of it is when the enforcers of the rules are the one who break them. Until they start following the regulations of the road, everything becomes a scoff law.