Thursday, December 23, 2004


Hi, my name is Stacie, and I'm addicted to chapstick. (Hi, Stacie.) A chapstick addiction really seems quite innocent compared to most of the addictions that exist, but can prove harrowing anyway. Consider, if you will, the plethora of selections available from the local department store. The flavor range and product names range from the normal (Mint) to the morid (stinky boy stench, which was grape flavored, by the by.) Managing and handling an addiction in such an environment can cause paralysis. My own addiction suffers most when a tube of chapstick is not readily available. To forever end this situation, I carry four or five tubes of chapstick in my purse. A couple more are stashed in my nightstand drawer. A few at my desk at work and in my truck and life is secure. But today, I noticed something different about my chapstick. It had directions. Remarkable that someone would require directions as to the usage of chapstick, I snickered. But nevertheless, there they were. "Apply to lips as needed." Duh. But what truly made me laugh was the warning printed just under the directions: "Stop use and ask a doctor if condition last more than 7 days." I've been using chapstick every day, several times a day, for more years than I can remember and never once thought that I might need to call a doctor since my (cough) "condition" wasn't improving. And when my schedule clears, I'll make an appointment for that very reason. I reckon I'll have time somewhere around 2021, after the baby graduates high school and before he goes to college. Provide, of course that I remember and nothing dramatic happens between now and then.

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